Perpetual Drafts of the Perpetually Daft

This journey is not going as planned so I need to remember why we are doing this in the first place. I need to remember why this is worth it. I am in really bad place of denial or procrastination so, thanks again bloggy for being there for me, always 😂 - I want to be able to attend my kids school events without worry about getting a sub or wondering if I have enough days in my "bank" to take them. - I want to get away from all this traffic! - I want to go places and not worry about the parking - or traffic! - I want to be able to teach in a way that is closer to my personal approach to educating kids. - I want my own home. - I want my kids to be able to go out more - I want experience life in a small(er) town. - I want my kids to experience life in a small(er) town. - I want the majority of my daytime hours to be outdoors.

My updated list, for your perusal: 1.DONE! Thanks Christina!  Eat at Ayada Thai  2. Eat at Purple Yam 3. Eat at Papaya King 4. Eat at Peter Lugers 5. Eat at Karenderya 6. Eat at Lemon Ice King     6a. Eat at Nixtamal Tortileria 7. DONE!  Chaperone a class trip  8. DONE!  Watch a Broadway play with the boys  9. Ride the Roosevelt Island Tram 10.Visit the Cloisters 11.Visit the Guggenheim       11a. Visit Hall of Science 12. Visit the Northfork vineyards 13. Meet up with family/friends:     JZ, PO , BN, MT, JB , SQ ,  CB ,  AV , LP ,      NR, FR, RU, RS, JC,  CN , PF, EC, VC, CY, BM

So June is usually a busy month for me school-wise - finishing assessment updates, graduation video, etc but this year's June will be a doozy. And if you know me and being busy, you know that will mean an incredible degree of creative procrastination. I'm no longer down on myself about this - it's my necessary process, yo! Hence, the third blog post in a day.  My updated list, for your perusal: 1.DONE! Thanks Christina! Eat at Ayada Thai  2. Eat at Purple Yam  3. Eat at Papaya King  4. Eat at Peter Lugers  5. Eat at Karenderya  6. Eat at Lemon Ice King  7. DONE! Chaperone a class trip  8. DONE! Watch a Broadway play with the boys  9. Ride the Roosevelt Island Tram  10. Visit the Cloisters  11. Visit the Guggenheim  12. Visit the Northfork vineyards  13. Meet up with family/friends:  JZ, PO, BN, MT, JB, SQ, CB , AV , NR, FR, RU, RS, JC, CN , PF, EC, VC, CY Stuff I did to commemorate our move with ou...

I also started something new today and I wish I could be more open about celebrating this. I've been raising the roof all by my lonesome all day with this exciting new thing and I can't wait to talk about it with my friends for the upcoming few weekends of friend catch-ups. We are making changes in our lives that many people might not understand. Thankfully, I have friends and family that actually do understand and have done much more drastic and courageous changes in their lives. Many people want to make changes in their lives but are either bound to something out of their control or just don't have the cajones to take an extremely scary plunge. I'm thankful, that at least for this moment, we are ready to take this leap of (very well researched and analyzed, bwahaha) faith.

I just did it. And I'm tearing up. No turning back now. Again. Well, I have 5 years apparently but it still feels so final.

I think we finally settled on a departure date. Which is 58 days from now. The list of things to see, do, eat, enjoy takes on a greater weight. Knowing we will be back in town early next year takes some of the pressure off though. Here is the list as of now: Eat at Ayada Thai Eat at Purple Yam Eat at Papaya King Eat at Peter Lugers Eat at Karenderya Eat at Lemon Ice King Chaperone a class trip Watch a Broadway play with the boys Ride the Roosevelt Island Tram Visit the Cloisters Visit the Guggenheim Visit the Northfork vineyards Meet up with family/friends: JZ, PO, BN, MT, JB, SQ, CB, AV, NR, FR, RU, RS, JC, CN, PF, EC, VC, CY

Well, the cat's out of the bag. Future plans have been shared with the appropriate folks. This family is moving. Moving from a fairly comfortable life despite the daily annoyances of our current location. As we get close to our departure, time seems to warp. As usual, more swirling in this stressed out, a bit overwhelmed mind, and nothing else to write...

Sometimes I think, what the heck are we doing? Is this really happening? Are we making the right decision? Is it too late to go back to it just being a far off dream, a seed of an idea, inspired by others who have made such drastic changes in their lives? No turning back now, I'm afraid. I'm afraid.

The puzzle pieces are starting to come together. More definition in the direction of our lives. I am so close to being able to share the angst and excitement I've been feeling the past few months. Just know, this Sunday is pretty important and though I can't quite tell you all about it, please send your positive vibes our way...

So much to share, timing is not quite right yet.

And when I say that, I mean that time is relative. And it is necessary but I really hate how fast or how slow it goes sometimes. Time also carries more significance for some and less so for others. And I'm really tired of talking and writing in circles. But when it all comes out, will I be able to handle the response. I sure hope so. Ugh here's to less vaguebook from here on out. I want to be here. I really need to BE here. But I'm already there. This is already gone. It is already the future and I am a ghost of the present. Trying my bestest to re-materialize from my jaunt into the future. I'm trying, I really am, but ugh, I just don't wanna work that hard. At least at the present moment.

Just like that, my net is gone. It's what I thought I wanted and what I think I need but doesn't keep me from being slight scurrred and nervous. Here we go.

I'm already gone. I can't wait until I can dispense with all these annoyingly ambiguous mutterings...

But naps are just so inviting...

Just when I thought I was in complete control of the hats that I have been wearing and which one I could leave behind, I am humbled by the will of the universe. Could I BE any more vague? Stay tuned, my friends.

A long title in honor of the long absence from this blog. I almost forgot about you! There is so much to talk about I don't know where to begin but I will probably end up not telling you anything of consequence. Sorry/not sorry for your wasted time but if you were looking to pass the time somewhere, thank you for choosing to spend it here. You will never get that time back. Ha! The past two weeks have been so incredibly hectic and busy that I could not imagine getting to today. I'm feeling only slightly guilty for not taking my parents and kids out today and take advantage of a relatively responsibility-free day. I feel the guilt, but I am allowing it to wash over and pass me as I know that I really need this time to do "nothing." And it's not even a nothing-free day, just not the amount of busy-ness that I have been accustomed to in the weeks pass. Our time at Toy Fair was so much fun. It was so freaking tiring, but in such a different way that we almost didn...

I have so much to do that needs to be done yesterday but all I want to do is take a nap. Comforters are just so comforting....

(Trying to get this brief flash of inspiration in before it settles comfortably in that file cabinet of cool blog post ideas) My youngest sat down at the piano today after I reminded him to practice. I asked him, "what do you have to practice for your next lesson?" He says, "I have to make major Do-Re-Mis." I said, "Okay", not really understanding what that actually was. I leave the room. After a few seconds, I hear him play a major C scale with him singing along, Do-Re-Mi..." Then nothing. A minute or so passes and I hear feet shuffling and sobs. I come back in the room and ask him what's wrong. "It's too hard!" he says between sobs. I say, "that is why you need to practice!" Geez, how did my parents get me to practice daily, for 30 minutes, without fail or complaint. Perhaps my childhood memories are a bit fuzzy. He continues to sob whiny-ly. "But, I just can't do it." I guess what he was to...

Every school day morning, there is a 20 minute window between one of the kids’ drop off and the second. We usually sit in the car, listening to music. I finish my breakfast or he draws on the rock that lives in the car or the extra street parking stubs on the dashboard. This morning we watched the top of the tree in front of us as 5 or 6 birds flew in to land then one by one left and then watched others circle back. He observed they were brown and black. I saw some with white bellies. We did not know what kind of birds they were. I think we will do the same tomorrow -#sitspot in the city 😍 A post shared by Tinkergarten Erna (@natureloveplay) on Feb 5, 2018 at 5:15am PST

In which the theme of this blog posts asks the question: “why does it take a fever to finally have a activity-free weekend?”

I've been trying to keep this updated at least once a week and yipes, I nearly passed the 7 day mark! Would it be cheating if I linked to my other blog, the place that I'm supposed to be writing in more, but I end up kicking around and procrastinating here? Not cheating if I also write here, right? Right? Okay, here. Been busy at all 3 of my jobs lately, hence the lack of even procrastinatory posts here. Like, that busy. My writing brain has been used up in my other lives so, why don't I just end here while I'm behind. Lots of other random thoughts floating in my head and I can't wait to put it down here soon. Peace out. Check out my favorite youTuber for your viewing pleasure in the meantime:

I wish I had the drive to write letters to friends again. I was going to text most of the following to a friend of mine, but I realize this is something that everyone needs to hear from time to time. It's about gratitude and seeking to feel it more in our lives. If my long text were in letter form, it would go something like this: Dear You, As usual, we never have enough time to have a fully realized conversation. Today, I kept saying sorry because I couldn't make it better and I really did want to help you feel better. You might not believe this, but I think of you often, not in a creepy way,😜 but it just shows how much you mean to me. You must know that you are important to a lot of people. Be grateful for that and the other blessings in your life. You have a roof over your head, people that love you, a job, your health, your faith, your cuteness. There is so much to be grateful for - that is your fuel to keep going. I have some friends and family that have been goin...

A few awesome things happened tonight.  Once On This Island Broadway   was an incredible, moving, immersive experience. I thought of cousin's daughter (a fellow Broadway musical geek)  almost the entire time, I wish she could experience this with us.  I’ve never had such mixed emotions at the end of a show like this - bursting with happiness and sadness and disappointment and hope pushed out some unintended tears. The cast was incredible. They were really strict with pics so I wasn’t able to photograph our  front row seats. The play takes place at the  What we found out was that sitting in the front row, you are literally stepping on this island, our shoes on the sand!  I was sitting right next to Alex Newell’s (from Glee!) character’s cooking station. He was actually cooking, chopping a plantain and throwing it into a pan as people were still coming in and settling in their seats! You walk into the theater and there’s a little girl sitting in th...

Once I again, I find myself with wet hair and limited time before an appointment. May the Creative Procrastination commence! I've had a bunch of random thoughts over the past few days that I meant to put down here so let me just get those out now, to be further developed later on (ha! where have I heard that before?!) 1. I should add photos or some kind of image with my posts for I don't know aesthetic reasons. 2. One of my early childhood memories was during Santa Cruzan season in the Philippines. Here is a photo not actually in the Philippines but in the West Village when I was about 17 years old during a Santa Cruzan. Yep, in my past life I was Miss Philippines 😹 I spent many summers there growing up. I wish I had a photo of the memory I have from my experience of one of these marches in the Philippines. I must have been about 6 or 7 years old. The Santacruzan had to be at night but I can't be sure. Now I'm thinking, was it even a Santacruzan? I kn...

Happy New Year! For the record, it takes about 5 layers of clothes to feel comfortable outdoors on a chilly day like today. Layers include an undershirt, base layer, long sleeve shirt, sweatshirt or sweater, underpants, ski bib, wool socks, boots, wool hat, winter ready jacket and mittens. There's (almost) no such thing as bad weather if you dress correctly :)